Who Do You Say that I Am?

– Topher Endress

I don’t know where I first heard the term, but a humblebrag is a statement that someone uses to try to look humble, but really are just bragging.  Imaginative name, I know.  But, though the definition is pretty straight-forward, let me give you an example: “I really struggled with being impatient this weekend.  It was just really hard to stay focused all the time, especially since I was leading a weekend retreat for a group if developmentally handicapped students.”

See, I admit to being impatient, and therefore appear humble. But then I mention in the same breath that I selflessly spent my weekend serving a group of special needs guys.  Thus, a humblebrag.

I don’t really have any reason for bringing up that term other than I wanted to bring up this weekend and couldn’t without inadvertently bragging.  I felt like I could justify it if I called myself out first.

Now that that is out of the way, on to the real story!  I am a fairly new presence in these kids’ lives, and many don’t have great memories skills to begin with.  As such, I had to tell them my name several times throughout the weekend.  And sometimes, when they couldn’t remember and didn’t want to ask, they would make something up. At one point, a guy named Clay decided to go with the nickname, “boss-man.”  I like to think he meant boss as in “that guy is so boss,” and not “that guy is one bossy S.O.B.”

It was a pretty cool nickname for the weekend, but it got me thinking about whatit we are called and we call each other.  This summer, my predominate nickname was “Go 4 (Gopher) Topher,” in part because that is how I was required to answer the walkie and partially because I was constantly running around and doing little tasks for everyone.  Before that, I generally didn’t have a good nickname.  (I was, however, recently called “The Enforcer,” which was a nickname I had always wanted.)  However, it is still interesting how people choose to talk about you.  Maybe I’m just weird, but I notice how people address me.

“Bro” is a popular one.  “Dude” and “man” are obviously popular as well.  But then, they are for pretty much every guy.  But sometimes, one of my good friends will refer to me as his “brother.”  I cannot tell you how much I appreciate when that happens.  Sure, having a cool nickname is fun and often an indicator of a good friendship (right, Baby Bear?), but I would so much rather hear someone call me a brother and actually mean it.

Just think about what those names mean.  Would you rather have a friend call you by some generic moniker, or by something that implies you are family?  Frankly, there is a huge difference in “bro” and “brother.”  If you think I don’t want to have your respect, feel free to ‘bro’ it up.  But if you think that I’d appreciate knowing that we have a bond deeper than mere friendship, try switching over to ‘brother.’  I can promise you that it actually means something.

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